#the audacity of my brain
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Me when I’m NOT writing: Ideas flowing like a waterfall. Me when I AM writing: [Dial-up tone noises]
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is anyone else horny af on main but then weird and quiet and incapable of sexual advances in person or is that just me?
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Me: absolutely no time to spare, crumbling under my to do list
Also me: why is there no cycling race I could watch from start to finish this month?
#the audacity of my brain#I cannot#I can finally catch a break and try to make a dent into all I have to do#and I’m missing stuff that takes hours in my day#I mean#I’m self aware enough to know that what I want is to avoid my responsibilities for hours on end#but I should really really take the opportunity to DO THINGS#especially with the biathlon season coming up#cycling#road cycling#come on! 💪
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I've gotten to the point with my mental health that I am mostly fine and dandy but then - like today - I experience sensory overload so bad that it takes all my self control to not have an anxiety attack in the middle of the store
#eva rambles#the audacity of my brain#I haven't had sensory overload THAT bad in so long#but there were so many people and so much noise and scents and my brain just kinda fried#I was very close to sobbing in the vegetable isle#anyway I might invest in some loop earplugs#I heard good things about them helping with sensory overload
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What sort of neurodivergent fuckery caused the cursed amalgamation that was a mash-up of 'Cheap Thrills' (Sia) and 'Into the Unknown' (Idina Menzel) to be stuck in my head most of the day today?
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HAYDEN CHRISTENSEN The Last Man (2019) | dir. Rodrigo H. Vila
#mine#gifs#hayden christensen#hchristensenedit#haydenchristensenedit#the last man#the last man (2019)#userthing#films#usersource#filmedit#tvfilmsource#tvfilmspot#dailyflicks#blackandwhiteedit#filmtvgifs#dilfgifs#fadenet#paletmblr#paleresource#giffingpale#tuserlarissa#usershale#tusermelissa#helpppppppp#i'm the gun btw#lads you don't understand how this movie has permanently altered my brain chemistry#because how DARE he#the audacity of this man istg
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I was NOT thinking straight
#breaking bad#skyler white#and walt had the audacity NOT to be happy with his life??#she did not deserve all those idiots around her#just her in this scene rent free in my brain#brba
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Releasing chapter 426 after the anime FINALLY adapted the Touya backstory feels like an attack against me specifically
Look at this and tell me this wasn't meant to hurt me?
#bnha#bnha spoilers#bnha leaks#bnha 426#and after I made a lovely amv for my beautiful touya#spent a whole day staring at his face only for Horikoshi to do this. absolutely unbelievable. the audacity of this man#reignite my brain rot only to kill him off#I am agog#i am aghast
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when a battle can't be solved with dark nova yakumo
#me at the sorceror's trials when i can't brute force it#there are probably better attackers out there since DN yaku got released a while ago#but i don't have them.#so every time there's a problem#i throw my nerdworm at the enemies to make them go away LOL#then the gimmick has the AUDACITY to be like#(. ❛ ᴗ ❛.) teehe.e. the enemies counter 300% every turn#or#(*/ω\*) oh no ! your attacker in that slot can't do anything but guard!#[irritably starts shuffling my units around the roster like i'm a cup sliding scam artist]#STOP THAT. IF I CAN'T MELEE MY WAY OUT OF THIS I'LL HAVE TO uSE MY BRAIN#AND NO ONE WILL LIKE THAT#IF I CAN'T TAKE DOWN AT LEAST 40% OF THE ENEMY'S HP IN ONE HIT THEN THE DOPAMINE AINT GONNA CASCADE DOWN MY SYNAPSES LIKE TROPICAL RAIN#nu carnival yakumo
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A very drunk Zayne constantly referring to MC as "Pretty Lady"
#it was only two drinks boo 😭#i should be studying#but this man has the audacity to be living in my brain rent free atm#send help#zayne#zayne love and deepspace#love and deepspace#love & deepspace#l&ds#lads
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Lost You Forever 2 Trailer!
English subs by me. If there are egregious errors, please let me know. Thanks @dangermousie for sending me the link!
#lost you forever#lost you forever 2#cdrama#seriously my Mandarin is beginner level#maybe beginner plus...#and I have the audacity to try to do translations#it took so long and so much brain power!#but maybe it's better than AI subs lol 🤞🏻#I can't fucking wait for this omg#thanks mousie for introducing me to it!#Deng wei#yang zi#zhang wanyi#tan jianci#god damn it I caught an error! oh well it's good enough lol#and I did nice slow Viki style subs#because Mr. highlynerdy says all the other sites subs are way too quick#长相思
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it’s you and me 🧡
#i’m soooo emotional over this photoooo#book’s audacity to causally post this like it’s not changing my brain chemistry#forcebook#force jiratchapong#book kasidet#mj talks
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:-)
#lil guy............#i woke up with so many kel thoughts today#brain full of redhead.#i have a vision for this post but idk. it might be out of my skill range to be honest#like i want the format to be kind of like a comic but. i literally do not know how to do that. that takes so much thinking.#so much planning.#also my pc blue screened bc i had the audacity to open my browser while rendering so#that sapped all of my motivation to work on anything ngl#i might give up for the day & do some writing instead.#or give the boys more outfits.#or draw maybe. hm.#idk. like i want to do *something* but literally all i can think about. is how kelly eats his sandwiches wrong.#n e way.#rainyrambles
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It’s so embarrassing and heartbreaking being in so much pain over losing someone while knowing they don’t give a fuck if you live or die. Your favorite person becoming a stranger is a special kind of hell.
#I fucking hate having bpd#while I’m at it I don’t understand the fuckin audacity some people have to say they love you and do horrible things to you#I feel so stupid#I feel so stupid for believing all the lies#but I was so in love and put him on such a pedestal that I just allowed it all.#thinking about someone constantly and grieving over them and knowing they’re perfectly fine and to them you don’t exist#I’m still in such a state of grief and I don’t understand why time hasn’t healed#it honestly feels like it’s gotten worse w time#I just torture myself but I can’t help it my brain wants me dead#it’s so painful I feel so fucking stupid#being abandoned with no closure by someone who’s your entire world#for someone they were unfaithful to you with multiple times (I don’t even know how many and dony want to know) immediately#like that was the plan all along#he took our cat hundreds of miles away and I don’t even know if he still has her or if she’s still alive and I miss her every day#I never loved someone like that and it feels like the heartbreak is actually physically killing me#i spent 1/5 of my entire life with him#I was my prettiest and had the best body at the time and I wasted it on someone who didn’t appreciate me#not wasted. it wasn’t wasted. we had some incredible times together#I’ll never be that beautiful again#and now idk what do so bc i can’t decide which is worse: being alone and isolating or loving deeply and ending up horribly hurt all over#it’s all just so upsetting.#and I feel so stupid for allowing it all#he knows more about me than anyone and he made me feel like he loved me so much sometimes and then did horrid things and it’s so fucked up#nobody read this I’m so embarrassed and horribly broken#it traumatized me so much there was so much abuse and pain idk if I’ll ever recover#I deserved it but it still hurts my heart#I was so mentally ill and sick I know it had to have been miserable to be around me#there are so many things only he understands and knows about me and I need to talk about them I j wanna b able to b there 4 each other#but that girl is so beyond insecure and controlling so. if I want to talk to who fuckin gets me I’m just fucked#why lead someone on like that for years knowing you’re going to abandon them the second it’s convenient
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hawks sticking his nose in the todoroki family’s business for the final time 😭
#i have a lot of thoughts ihhh my brain is switching between optimism and pessimism atp#but idk atleast that part made me laugh at the audacity#because wym todoroki family got wrapped up in a few chapters but here comes president hawks with a sword#lmfao????#this isn’t hawks hate btw i’m actually glad to see one of my favorite characters not on the brink of death#mha spoilers#mha 426#bnha spoilers#kl.txt
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next month me and my grandma are going to visit my godfather who lives in Spain, but instead of being excited (it's gonna be my second time abroad in my life) I'm anxious af, because even though I'm an adult I live with my parents and I need to tell my father about it. normal parents would - y'know - be happy that their children have opportunity to visit another country, but instead he's gonna be insufferable about it, because it's my mom's side of family and he despises my uncle. but what is he gonna do? kick me out of the house even though he promised that as long as I'm studying or working I don't need to worry about such thing, humiliate me as usual, tell me that I'm childish and spoiled or make my mom's life a living hell again? I'm aware of the fact that the longer I'm putting it off the worse his reaction is gonna be, but I'm just not mentally able to tell him that, because I don't know how he will react. I don't need any money from him, I don't have to use my phone during this trip (I dunno how the roaming and stuff work), I just want to be sure he's gonna behave like a proper human being towards my mom and my siblings when I won't be at home and not act like a total asshole while talking with me about it.
#i know that at my age i should be more mature and handle such situations better but as long as he's the way he is it's impossible#why can't both my parents be normal#and the fact that i wasn't able to get any summer job this year isn't making it any better because i know it's gonna be one of his argument#(czaicie to że nawet do żabki mnie nie chcieli. dosłownie emotional i brain damage)#'you didn't work so from where do you get the money for that'#don't worry definitely not from you because you can't even pay for my monthly train ticket to college#and at the same time have the audacity to call me dumb for commuting there instead of living in that city#while knowing that neither me nor mom can afford renting anything without your help#(okay i'm a bit exaggerating in my mom's case but she earns much less than him and he still makes problems with literally anything#even buying food even though he's in a very good financial situation and there are times when my mom has to make everything work all alone#because he's getting mad at her out of nowhere and only pays the bills that fortunately aren't that bad in our case)#(and unfortunately the bills include my telephone subscribtion because all of our numbers are in some kind of special offer where you pay#much less for one number when they're registered for one person so it's another problem in this situation because when i offered paying for#mine he refused and probably it'll be his another argument for becoming mad that i dare to spend time with the part of family that cares#about me unlike majority of his relatives)#i hope that at least when academic year starts i'll be able to get any part-time job on the weekends so i can save up more money#although i'm not sure if i'm gonna move out in the nearest future. i mean he's fucking insufferable and toxic but i just can't leave my mom#and especially siblings there even though i can't even fucking protect them from literally anything. at this point i'm just powerless.#there are times when he tries to change for the better but then he starts creating problems on purpose and everything is coming full circle#and the sole thought that my little siblings would tell me that i just ran away from this problem is fucking killing me.#niedziela wieczór i humor niegituwa. zawsze kurwa kurwa coś.#chuj idę słuchać myslovitz#pau.txt
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